End of semester 1

When I first started my first semester here I though of it as laid back and not as stressful as I thought it should be. Well now that its the end, I now know its very stressful. Its hard to keep up with the assignments most of the time. I sometimes got so stressed that I couldn't do them. Weird? I know.
Even though I thought it was very stressful I still love it compared to high school. And still don't miss it. I still love the indepenedence but then I don't because most of my teachers don't remind us what is due or even tell us the assignments. Its up to us to look on the syllubus.
I found it very hard to manage my time wisley. To where I can get all my homework done and still have me time. There was never a moment that I wasn't thinking about school and if I had everything done.
Now that I have experienced a semester in college I hope I will do better keeping up and with time management next semester.

Racism, Sexism, and Difference

In the book EveryDay Courage, the teens Tyrone, Guillermo, and Marvin all experienced racism. Tyrone gets watched everytime he goes to a store and gets accused that he's stealing. Even though he has the money right in his hand. Guillermo got threatened to be arrested just because he was on the street waiting for his friend for not even 5 minuets. Marvin got denied when he was asking for a job where it was hiring. The next day a white boy was working there.
The girls in this chapter didn't really have any experiences in racism "yet". They all assume they will in the future when they start their careers.
Personally since I'm white and went to an all white school I didn't experience racism. But I grew up with racism around me. Almost everyone I went to school with was racist. They would yell at black people walking on the side walks. They would also say that its not safe here in the winter because the black college students are back in town.
I think people do need to talk about it more. Ecspecially the people who are racist. They should sit down and talk with different colored people to find out that they are the same as you and me.

Change?

Now that I am on break I have a chance to think about all that has changed just because I have started college. I have changed over that past few months.
Last thanksgivings break I hung out with my friends and boyfriend, never home but only to sleep. Even on thanksgiving day I was home when the food was done and left when I was done eating.
This thanksgiving is different I'm having dinner at my own house that I live with my boyfriend. I'm spending time with my parents and my boyfriends dad and step mom. Its all about family now.
Now I don't spend much time with friends. I have other more important things to do than to be with my friends all the time. I have home work, studying, and family. Even though I do spend time with friends sometimes when my time is free. I think I have become more responsible now that I am in college. I actually do the assignments and study. I'm happy to do those things now that i'm in college since Its actually for my future. I put the more important things that need to be done before that less important. I also think about my future a lot. I try to do what will be positive for my future and my career. I take more resposiblity for my home. I don't live with my parents anymore. I have to do the dishes, laundry and clean. I even have to take care of my cat and mow the grass. I have to cook supper for my boyfriend and I. Witch cooking has been an experience in itself. ha!

The worst thing so far....

The worst thing so far about college is that my friends and I have drifted apart. We were the closest three girls in our high school. We never went anywhere without one another. The only time we were apart was when we were with our boyfriends. We had so many inside jokes about many different things that no one could understand. We would laugh randomly and every one would stare. We have been best friends since 7th grade.

One reason how we drifted apart is that they went to Pittsburgh for college. I stayed home to stay close to my boyfriend. Plus there was no trade school that I could go to do what I want to do with my life. Those two went the same path and I didn't. They don't come home often and when they do they mostly spend time with their families. I only saw them one weekend they came home out of 6.

Another reason why we drifted apart is because I currently have a crappy phone. It won’t let me text anyone that doesn’t have the same phone as me. Well it does let me text them but it comes up weird. If I would say “ hey, how have you been?” the text will read on their phone “Hey it’s a nice day to mow.” It’s frustrating that I can’t keep up with my friends.

Country living.

I interviewed my boyfriend, Ryan. He grew up in Rossiter, PA. Its a small town over the hill from Punxsy. Its even smaller than Punxsy, believe it or not. Some of his family live their. Majority of the population in Rossiter are rest homers. There are about 5 rest homes in that town and two of them are on the street that he use to live on. They walk around like zombies. There is only one little store, so people basically shop in Punxsy.
While growing up in Rossiter, Ryan played with his older brother and sister. They would play with other kids in the town but his mom was too protective. Back then Rossiter was a very violent place. They have to trick or treat in the day light now, reason being is that a long time ago the older kids would beat up the littler kids for their candy. So, Ryan didn't go trick or treating in Rossiter that much, he went in Punxsy at night time. Him and his brother would ride bikes on the street, walk in the woods, skateboard, and wrestle. He was always out side. He didn't play video games that much or even watch TV.
Every weekend he would go with his dad. His mom and dad are not together. He would spend his weekends working on his dirt bike or hunting with his dad. He has a very close relationship with his dad. When he would be at his dads so would his half sister. He considered her to be his sibling more than his older ones. She was younger and didn't follow what others were doing like his older brother and sister.
Ryan was the only kid to graduate high school. His brother and sister dropped out and had kids and a very young age. His brother cuts meat for a living, has three kids and lives with his girl friend. His sister has two kids and doesn't have a job, basically lives on welfare and her kids child support. Ryan has his own house, works at a high end gas well company and does all the good that he can to do better than his siblings. His dad effected his life in a positive way it seems. He looked up to his dad and learned from his mistakes.  

College So far.

How is college so far? Every time I see someone in my family, they ask me that same question. I tell them its going really good. But in a more depth description, I'm stressed, over whelmed and exhausted. But yet its still going really good.

Home work and all the hard work stresses me out. after my two or three classes I go to the library to do my homework. Reason for that is that I don't have Internet at my house because I live in the middle of no where and I can focus more when I'm in a quiet place. All I want to do after my class is to go home and relax, but instead I go to the library and do what needs to be done. All this homework makes me stressed. I'm over whelmed by all the work and time you have to put in to everything in college. In high school I never did anything for any of my classes. It also makes me exhausted when I get home. I always say I'm going to study at home, but I hardly do because I just want to take a break.

For my history test this week I put relaxing and studying together. I was watching tv and laying down, I'd study during the comercials. I'd mute the tv every now and then to go through the study guide more in depth. It worked out pretty good. I didn't hesitate during one question on the test. Studying the week before the test helped too.

Some people say to me that I'm stressed, over whelmed and exhuasted because I do everything as soon as its assigned. I don't wait till the night before to do a mastery test or to write notes. I feel like I have more work to do if I wait till the night before.

Desire and Betrayal in Friendships

I'm reading a chapter in Everyday Courage called Desire and Betrayal in Friendships. I can relate to it because I look for trust, honesty, and loyalty in my friendships. If I trust a friend and they go behind my back, it kinda makes me not trust people or believe them.
    I read about Albert. He likes to stay at home and to be on the safe side. He doesn't like hanging out with people getting killed. He doesn't think that he has any friends because he "feels a close friend is going to be there for you and they'll support you and stuff like that". He had a friend once but he stole his stuff like tapes and his girlfriend. Now he has problems trusting and people being loyal to him.
     I also read about Marcus. Marcus doesn't really have the problems with friendship like Albert does, but he thinks they are a waste of time. He has allot of friends that he hangs out with. He once had a best friend for 8 years but he had to move to Florida. Now, he thinks they are a waste of time because they might end up having to leave.
  I can relate to both of them because like Albert I need trust and loyalty from a friendship. I can relate to Marus because it would be hard if one of your best friends all of a sudden left you one day. I would have trouble finding someone worth my time and effort to become best friends with.
   As I read about Marie, I relate to her but then I don't. Her best friend is her cousin. I am not so close with any of my family like that. Marie and her cousin never had "the first argument yet". Her cousin doesn't lie to her and she is real. I can relate to her because she is right about "sometimes people be like your best friend could be your worst friend because they know everything, you know". I have problems trusting my friends and sometimes that statement runs through my head. Can I trust you? Are you telling other people what i say? But I guess you just have to trust that they aren't untill you hear other wise.
     I also read about a girl named Sonia. She has friends but her best friend is her sister. They are open with each other. I don't have any siblings to be close with, so I kinda rely on school and social events to have friends. I once too use to think that I had so many best friends just like Sonia did, but it boiled down to the same thing.


 "Girls voiced many more fears about being in relationships with boys than boys voiced about being in relationships with girls."
I agree with this quote because some girls trust the guy they date then the boy would do something to break that trust. That's why girls are scared of getting involved with guys. Most boys I think feel like they can be themselves while they are with the right girl because around their guy friends they would have to act tough and rough around the edges.